Bing Bong

It costs money to die. They make sure you settle the bill before they’ll come near you with needles. But I’m only being unkind because the whole business of living is such a remarkable sham. That’s what it is, a business. Our life is a series of transactions. And we give it meaning because we contain the extraordinary gift to do so. But every move … Continue reading Bing Bong

keep on movin’

I still remember the night we got home. Ruidoso remains my favorite place to think of. It feels like another planet now, not only because we traveled across a burnt desert to get there, but because of what came out of it. Two totally different people, leaving the crackling mountain heat for the humid May air, transformed. I knew I loved you before I left … Continue reading keep on movin’

twenty seven

27, you worked so hard. What more can I say besides thank you? I had the urging to read Crossroads today. It hadn’t hit me how fitting that was on this day, the last day I’ll be 27, until I was stewing in elderberry, lighting the candle I said I’d never burn. Crossroads was the illustrious, miserable, luminescent, hopeless cry for help and ballad of … Continue reading twenty seven

The Harbinger

A woman died today. A 60-story building stood unmoved in her wake. I imagine the nascent rays of the day finding her where she lay. I imagine the turmoil and resoluteness with which she left the world. And I wilt.  I torture myself with false futures when silence leases space for my mind to wander. There’s no part of my tandem heart that accepts the … Continue reading The Harbinger

near miss

I wonder if I was ever closer to you than that train platform in Queens. I wonder where I was when you were falling in love with someone else. What I was thinking about when you had your first kiss. I wonder if I was laughing while your heart was breaking. I wonder how many moments you were marveling at the moon at the same … Continue reading near miss